The Saga of Refrigerator

Because so many of you expressed interest in the story...

Part I: Fellowship of the Washer Ring

In early April, I notice that Refrigerator makes ominous groaning sounds at periodic intervals.

Gradually, the sounds become more frequent, lengthier, and occur at a higher pitch.

One night in the middle of watching A View to a Kill, Refrigerator will not shut up.

 

We unplug Refrigerator.

All perishables are relocated to the working fridge in the empty apartment upstairs.

Cristina and I remove various nuts, bolts, screws, and panels from Refrigerator.

Refrigerator refuses to cooperate.

Part Deux: Appliance-ocalypse Now

Peter Pan the Handyman attempts to fix Refrigerator.

Refrigerator refuses to cooperate.

Part The Third: Soyled Greens

Weeks pass.

The repairman and I are never on the same schedule.

The perishables languish and go bad in the refrigerator in the empty apartment upstairs because I am too lazy to walk up the stairs and consume them.

I subsist on a diet of noodles and canned tuna.

Refrigerator continues to display hostile behavior.

About once a week, I decide I can handle Refrigerator's moaning and groaning in the name of all that is popsicles and iced coffee.  I plug Refrigerator in and make the journey upstairs to retrieve a handful of perishable items.  Inevitably, within 10-12 hours, Refrigerator has me burying my head under a pillow or hitting my head against a wall.  Drastic measures must be taken: I unplug Refrigerator yet again--and sometimes, the perishables: they perish. 

You may have won the battle, Refrigerator, but not the War...

Part IV: A False Hope

Peter Pan the Handyman attempts to fix Refrigerator once more, employing Jedi mind tricks, a wrench, and a couple of plastic bottle caps.

Refrigerator gets worse.

REFRIGERATOR OF DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.

Part V: Appliance: Resurrection

And so it came to pass that in the fifth week, the Repairman issued a decree that all old refrigerator motors must be replaced by new motors, at a cost of approximately $10 USD.

Lo, the Repairman came bearing gifts of gold, frankincense, and a new motor (minus the gold and frankincense).

There was duct tape, too.

And I saw that it was good.

AND NO THOSE ARE NOT THIN MINTS IN MY FREEZER WHY WOULD YOU SAY SUCH A THING?!?! THIS POST IS NOW OVER.

Part 6: Rise of the Machines coming soon to a theater near you!